Saturday, January 28, 2006

Confessions of a stay-at-home mommy....

1. We move in exactly one month, I have not packed one box yet! I have so much free time you know chasing an 18 mo. old around all day.

2. There was one day this week that I never even showered. Hey...don't get all judgemental on me the Europeans do it all the time and they call it sexy. Too bad that's not what Jason called it.

3. I found a cute animal pop-up book while shopping this week. I said to Luke, "Look.. you'll like this book it has pop-up animals" (his fav kind of book) and I handed it to him. He immediately opened the book to the pig page and grabbed the snout and ripped it out of the middle of the book. I promptly closed the book, put it back on the shelf and walked away. Yes, without purchasing it.

4. One day I found myself double knotting MY shoelaces, because I'm so used to doing it for Luke.

5. I ate the cookie off of Luke's children's meal at Scotty P's.

6. I was at Marshall's this week and this lady needed to go to the restroom. Only she had a purse that she wanted to purchase. Since you can't take unpaid merchandise into the restroom I noticed she set it on a shelf prior to walking into the restroom. Some little devious part of me wanted to move the purse to another shelf so that when she came out she couldn't find it. NO, I DIDN'T DO IT. But you gotta admit it would've been funny to stand back and watch her reaction. I know there's a special place in hell for people like me.

7. I actually had to spank Luke this week for gnawing on the bottom of his tennis shoe. WHILE he was wearing it. I kept telling him, "No, No--that's icky and dirty". He found something delicious about the rubber soles, until the spanking.

8. I gave Luke pedialyte and told him it was juice. He looked at me with a smile and said, "Zeus".

9. I told Luke that he looked like a dirty little DOG one day because he had snot crusted on his cheek from wiping his nose with his hand. He looked at me and said, "ruff ruff". I laughed so hard. At least he's learning his animal sounds.

10. I gave Luke some sliced apples and yogurt fruit dip to dip em' in just to see how cute and messy he'd get. He exceeded my expectations. At least the boy aim's high.

11. As you know every object Luke picks up he uses as either a phone or a hairbrush. One day this week I let him get in to the master closet while I was getting ready in the bathroom to keep him close to me. He emerged with a tampon "telephone" and tampon "hairbrush". At least he can multi-task.

12. Two days this week Luke had Wendy's chicken nugget meals even though daddy told us NOT to eat in the car.

13. Twice this week I tinkered with the thermostat because I was cold. In my house that's a no no. Jason is the only one "capable" (in his mind) of changing the temp. settings. I was cold and I did something about it.

Isn't my life exciting? Most of you would think it's pretty boring, but I however am perfectly content and love being at home with my precious son. It's these little moments that I cherish for I know that before long they'll be gone, never to return. Carpe Diem! Thanks for letting me share a laugh or two with you.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I liked ruff, ruff the best. What a little Winkerbean.

Luna

Brett and Jenny Perkins said...

Now that's funny! bdp

Amber said...

Great to be honest with yourself, right? I'm sure if I really thought I could come up with a list- like sometimes when I'm too lazy instead of giving Beau a bath-I just wipe him down with a wipey or a warm rag. Poor Beau!!

Anonymous said...

That was hilarious, you crack me up, my friend. You should write a humerous mommy book....you'd make a killin'!

Why doesn't Jay want you to eat in the car? His buds Shep and Hud do all of the time and Jason has seen our car!! It is ALWAYS so NICE AND SPARKLING CLEAN!!! ~ H1

Blueeyes said...

This was great! Thanks for the laughs! Keep up the good work!