Ok, I noticed a couple of things in my travels today. First, I was driving south on Hwy 75, Central Expressway otherwise known as Death Rd. (because of the atrocious way Dallas drivers...err DRIVE!) This thought popped into my head, right as I was passing Turrentine Funeral Home. The City of Allen & Turrentine's in a joint "revenue-ing" effort should erect a HUGE billboard out in front the funeral homes that says: "Slow Down, Or You'll End Up In Here". Aren't I philanthropic? Gosh, I should have been in advertising. Nothing like making a little dough off the dearly departed, right? Before you get all "Hints from Heloise" on me, know that I'm fully aware of how irreverant that would be, funny though (hey, you know you laughed) The Turrentine Funeral Home could bring in some extra fundage from the people NOT heeding the sign and City of Allen could get a little extra revenue by hiding under the underpass right before the exit to Turrentine. By the way, I hate Allen cops. When we lived in Allen they were always a day late and a dollar short when my druggie next door neighbor was dropping acid in the garage or making drug deals with the various people who'd stop by for a "visit" AT 3AM? And you wonder why we moved. I've heard that since our departure from Grassy Creek Dr. in 2006 that Mary Jane (yes that really IS her name--talk about IRONY) spent months in rehab. Maybe she's clean now. I hope for her 3 kids sake she is. Maybe CPS finally heeded MY warning.
In ironic news....I went up to visit my friend Allie (fellow bariatric patient w/complications) up at Baylor Hospital last night. I visited with her a couple hours rehashing our surgery war stories....I was such a great friend sneaking in contraband cheese crackers and tootsie rolls. I remember how comforting it was for Jason to sneak me in a Dr. Pepper when I was NPO (which means no food OR drink). You try to go 2 months w/o a Dr. Pepper. It can't be done.
Back to my story...as I was leaving the hospital I padded my way down the hall to the elevators. I stopped to laugh when I noticed this sign on the wall, "Please do not park ANY equipment/carts in front of this emergency shut-off valve"....You may ask, "Why is THAT so funny?"..Well, let me tell you. It was funny because in FRONT of the sign was parked a whole slew of medical equipment i.e. blood pressure taking machines. Yeah, IN FRONT of the emergency shut off valve. Anyway....I just got a kick outta Baylor. Always contradicting their own policies. Amazing.....
Allie is still awaiting a visit from the Dr. who hasn't come by since she was admitted on Wed. night. Her blood pressure is low and she's feeling lots of pain in her stomach. Luckily, the Fentanyl pain patch IS working, praise God. Please keep her in your prayers.
P.S. Why do I always get to ride on elevators with people who either smell like moth balls or cheap 1970's cologne. Tonight, I got the latter. Ugh! Followed by making the wrong turn down "pee pee" corridor, as I tried to locate Allie's hospital room. My senses are still feeling assaulted.
That's all the entertainment for now friends....